Today has been a great and hard day. I feel like all of my church meetings had been tailored to me and what I need to be doing right now. It was hard, yet uplifting.
Here's a little back info to understand today's slap:
I have lately been struggling with how to go about fulfilling my calling. I am the VT coordinator in Relief Society. And it has been such a struggle to get my supervisors to report to me in a decent time frame since I have started this calling. Honestly I am lucky so far if I get one supervisor to report within the first 3 days after the month has ended. This has caused much frustration, annoyance, judgmental thoughts, and ranting to Sam about how I can't get anything done without them doing their calling. It seriously has baffled me. I know callings can be hard, but seriously ... I literally feel like I have nagged a few of these girls to death asking them if they have their report for me. One of them I literally have not heard from in two months ... Don't get me wrong though. Not all of them are like this. I am pleased that there are a few that have been awesome and I am so grateful for that.
Anyways, today in Sacrament it was fast and testimony meeting. I can't really remember a lot of what was said but the general spirit there was definitely testifying to me of many things. One was about love of the Savior, the work and the glory of the Lord (this specific thought will have a blog post at another point), and many other things.
Sunday school was about the prophet and his calling, but it was the end that really hit me. Love. Love people, serve people, treat them with Christlike feelings. Do you get where I'm going with this?
Relief society: the lesson was on callings. HA! The sister started off talking about what are good attributes of a leader and then went on to talk about why fulfilling callings were so important. And of course being the awful person I am my first thought was "I sure hope my supervisors are listening" and a split second after that was "Erin I sure hope YOU'RE listening!"
Well that was really my slap. The rest was really uplifting words and spiritual feelings that I needed. It got me thinking though about I maybe I need to be approaching my calling differently. I need to love these sisters. They are probably thinking every time they get a text or email from me "oh my heck seriously?". So my challenge this week is to figure out how to love my sisters that I'm over. How on earth can I do that? Well before this Sunday I had been planning on holding a meeting with all of them together. I may not love them the way Christ does but I do sincerely want to help them succeed (and I do hope eventually I will feel that love for them). I want them to understand that when I say over and over that if they need help to let me know I mean it. I want them to know I won't judge them if they completely forgot to get their report to me, or that they lost their sisters; information. That I will still help them and still love them, but that I NEED to know this information or I get incredibly exasperated not necessarily with them but with the situation of feeling stuck. This feeling that I need to be doing this didn't come to me today, it's actually been brewing for the past couple of weeks (especially after conference), but today it just really hit me how important this is. How important it is for these girls to feel loved and to know being perfect isn't necessary to fulfill this calling.
On another note: I have felt that I need to post more uplifting things. Not that my mod podge creations aren't uplifting but I would love to share some thoughts/messages that I have had or come across. The Prophet (and the Lord) have asked us to be better missionaries and to share the gospel. My bishop has asked us in our ward to reach out to each other. I feel that this is probably one way I can approach this task. So my goal is to post one uplifting once a week (or more) and share it on Facebook. Gasp! yes I shall be sharing my blog. Which actually really scares me. I have kind of been using this more as a spot to share things that I assume people really aren't going to read. But I do hope that people will read and will share their own thoughts and opinions (as long as it's appropriate and uplifting. I will take down or block anything that is rude, disrespectful or creating a hateful spirit).
PS I also changed my blog name! I finally decided on something I thought was appropriate. It also has special meaning because it reminds me of my younger sister. When we were younger and would participate in family scripture reading she always wanted to read even though she couldn't really read. So we would give her the scriptures and she would "read" them and she used this phrase all the time. I find it appropriate to use and hope that my life shall also come to pass in righteousness.
No comments:
Post a Comment